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The Incredible Bouncing Andrew

by Matt "The Mole" Mitchel


Here is a little story that most anybody who has ever had a part-time job relate to:


Andrew and the rest of the crew before the shift. Are his eyes open?

Due to some unfortunate luck (vandals, robbers, thieves, and the like), Andrew found himself on the bottom of his bank account and on the top of his charge card limits. He needed a little extra cash to financially support some of his pastimes. He also has been trying for the past three years to convince the owner of one of his frequented "Watering Holes" to let him bounce there for a night. Why he wanted to work there so desperately, no one is quite sure.

Just a few weeks ago, the management had two people quit and one other person was taken ill, leaving the bar short handed. They hadn't any other choice, so as a last resort they approached Andrew and inquired whether he would be interested. That's all it took, Andrew was now an official employee of The Red Creek (at least for a night).


Andrew takes a much needed break from standing around.

As an employee of this quality establishment, you are expected to wear a standard uniform - denim shirt, black pants, and tie of choice (no baseball caps, thus Andrew had to shower and shave). What is rather humorous, is the fact that Andrew spent much more money on the outfit than he could even plan on making at the job. Anything to fit in I guess.

The night was rather uneventful. Not a big crowd, no major brawls, and Andrew only threw out six people (all of them female. Hey, equal rights, who cares if it was Ladies Night). On top of all of this, Andrew wasn't feeling very well. Before his shift, he took some cold medicine. Alert was not a word that could have been used to describe Andrew. Maybe that was why all those women were thrown out. Andrew continues to claim that they looked like men.

According to the newbie bouncer, he would love to do it again. We will have to stay tuned and see if he is invited back to work there. Until that time, I guess we will all continue meeting there to discuss future endeavors of Cheech the Pentipede or Bosco the Land Shark.

Ed Note - Mole, as he is affectionately called, is one of our close friends. When he is not improving on his photojournalism skills, he is improving his underground palace. He also doesn't like the sun too much.


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