I got kicked out of the role of Grammer Nazi after the Grammer Nazi elections here in ATT. I haven't seen any Grammer Nazi action lately, so am I allowed to resume my post?

Under no circumstances. I mean, WTF is "grammer?"

-Pufer

If you can't spell it, then you can't be it.

Tuning fork your grammers!

Those darned "grammers" and "barears"!!!!!

You could be a Grammar Communist, I guess.

A quick peek at the election results reveals that you most certainly did not win.

So no.

The less Grammar Nazi's we have less of, the better with which we shall be. And here follows a sentence I place a preposition at the end of.
At the end of which I place a preposition.
Damn it, I just can't force myself to do it even to make a point.

Wow. Everywhere I look, aside from here, I se it spelled "Grammer" and not "Grammar." Although my computer does see it as "Grammar....

Well, duh, what did I say in my topic? I said something to the effect of how I lost the elections and how there's been no Grammar Nazi activity around.

So, now that I've gotten that straightened out (and learned the proper spelling for Grammar) can I resume my post as Grammar Nazi? I have been seeing a lot of uncorrected errors lately, even if not around here.

You left out the second "e" in "see".

I get the point. I'm not fit for Grammar Nazi anymore.

2 b teh gramer naht-zee u hav 2 studee mor gram0rz so u can korectt ppl mor beter

I think we've been through this before.

You nominated me for Grammer Nazi, remember?

Listen Zaphod, I just don't think you're cut out for the job.
To be a true Grammar Nazi, and not just a regular old Grammar Fascist, you need to know everything there is to know about grammar.

For example, can you tell me the two proper uses of the semicolon?
How about the six classes of adjectives?
Can you tell me how to identify a comma splice?
Do you know when to use the Dative case and all that it entails?
Can you recite the lyrics to Conjunction Junction, What's Your Function? from memory?

You see, Beeblebrox, being a Grammar Nazi isn't just a job. It's a lifestyle. Grammar must consume you entirely. You must eat, sleep and breathe it. Grammar must become more important to you than your own health.
Do you really think you're up to the task, Beeblebrox? Do you?!

I'm up for it. I am up for it!

I will do it! I... will... LIVE...! on Grammar.

You'll never make it. I haven't the faintest idea of what the dative case is beyond that it has something to do with 'whom,' and I've completed the requirements for two college degrees. I know worthless crap like I'm not supposed to be using single quotes to represent scare quotes in American English, but I doubt that anyone much gives a damn and would be annoyed if a real grammar nazi were to point that error in my previous sentence out to me.

Not only do you need to eat, sleep, and breathe grammar, you have to learn and manage to remember more pointless crap about entirely uninteresting things than even I am willing to memorize. That's a tall order.

-Pufer

But it can be done. If he does not become The Chosen Grammar Nazi, then who will?

And I'm pretty sure you have to eat, sleep, breathe, and listen to grammar.

You don't have to listen to grammar to understand it. That's why philologists are able to do what they do.

Okay, so I can't be Grammar Nazi. What other title can I have?

Grammer Nazi. [sic]

The only reason I know is because we learned about it in German because it's actually important there.
It's sort of funny how learning foreign languages actually teaches you a lot about your own language too. That's probably a bad sign, actually.

Tiga


It makes a lot of sense. We learn our native language naturally, but formal grammar is not natural. Technical terms and rules governing the use of nearly archaic but still "proper" forms (eg who vs whom) and all those other little bits of boring grammatical minutia are all things that must be learned formally.

This is what they tried to teach you in middle school English class, but unfortunately, learning the formal grammar of a language you know natively is excruciatingly boring. Because you take so much for granted, everything that you already know seems obvious and everything you don't know seems unimportant.

When you learn a new language, you can't take anything for granted, so you actually pay attention long enough to understand the obscure stuff. Then, realizing that there was more going on than you previously thought, you can turn around and apply that knowledge to your own language.

I'm just ######ing glad that English nouns don't have gender.

Possibly the only way that English is actually easier and makes more sense than other languages.

A Chinese immigrant that I know once compared learning to speak English to learning how to write Chinese. There's no particular rhyme or reason to it or logical system underlying it, it just gets to the the point that you know it.

-Pufer

I mean when I get 1,000 posts!

Speaking of grammar, why the hell do Americans put punctuation marks inside of quotation marks (or parentheses)? A quotation should stand alone - the sentence it resides in has no business inflicting punctuation upon it that wasn't there in the first place.

Well the worst part is that we don't put all of them inside. Question marks, for example, go outside (unless the actual quotation is a question). I didn't know we were supposed to put punctuation inside of parentheses, though (as you can obviously see).


Well that's just the American Way of Doing Things, and it doesn't just apply to grammar either.

So, you're not American?


I put my puntuation inside quotations, but outside parenthesis because what goes in parenthesis stays in parenthesis.

Not everyone here is American, CZB. Not by a long shot. And look at his 'From' box. It distinctly says Sydney, Australia.

As for punctuation, Americans typically put it outside of the parenthesis (unless for some reason it belongs in there. Like that period). If someone's doing it another way it's definitely not standard...

About understanding your own language better once you've begun learning another: definitely agree, I've seen it twice now (took Spanish for three years a long time ago and am now taking it again).

I'm not exactly bilingual... yet.

meh I can say 'hammer time' in chinese so I'm happy.

You know actually that does make a lot of sense. And probably explains why my Immigrant German teacher is also an English teacher. He's probably actually better at explaining it than native English speakers.

I fluently speak English and Internetish.

Lolz 2 dis convo.

Being, at heart, a narrow-minded provincial, I generally try to stick to American mannerisms and customs whenever one of those US/UK issues pops up. But God help me, this is one area where you Commonwealthers have us beat hands down. Put the period outside quotation mark! It's so much cleaner! How is that hard?!

There's been no Grammar Nazi activity because there's been nothing to nazi. I mean, just take a look at my title. I'm been gone for a monthish eliminating the whole problem completely. Though there will need to be some heavy Naziing now that I'm here again. And no you can't be a grammar Nazi if you can't spell grammar.

I am. English and PHP. Does that make me the Grammar Facist?

Apparently you have trouble facing grammar, so no.
(I hope someone gets the joke )

Multiple-entendre

Yeah I get the joke, sorta.

Why has this topic survived to a second page? WHY OH WHY???

We wanted to give you the chance to post again.

-Pufer

Oh, well how nice of you, Pufer.

So, if I can't have the title Grammar Nazi when I get 1,000 posts, what title can I have?

"Weirdo with a HomeStarRunner avatar"

And if I decide not?

We'll beat you with sacks of pennies.

-Pufer

Very bad time to say that, Pufer. My brother is trying to learn the guitar. It's annoying as hell, and I'm extremely irritated.

Oh yes?

-Pufer